Thursday, November 22, 2018 | Cloudy skies with moderate to occasionally heavy rains which may trigger flashfloods & landslides will be experienced over Ilocos region and the provinces of Batanes, Benguet, Zambales, Bataan & the islands of Babuyan.| North Korea detonates DMZ guard posts at southern border | Singapore, China Agree to Promote Maritime Arbitration | Duterte welcomes China’s Xi in Malacañang | Jehza Huelar, byaheng Poland | NBA-worst Cavs cut ties with JR Smith | 1 USD = 52.35 PhP as of closing Nov 21, 2018 |
SITE SEARCH
Usapang Marino
Jok Onli


Father's Occupation

"What's your father's occupation?" asked the school secretary on the first day of the new academic year.

"He's a magician, ma'am" said Little Johnny.

"How interesting. What's his favorite trick?"

"He saws people in half."

"Wow! Now, next question. Any brothers or sisters?"

"One half brother and two half sisters."

Source: ajokeaday.com


I Think I'm A Moth

"Doctor, I think I'm a moth."

"It's not a doctor you need, it's a psychiatrist."

"I was on my way there when I saw your light on."

Source: ajokeaday.com



When We Were First Married

One night at the dinner table, the wife commented, "When we were first married, you took the small piece of steak and gave me the larger. Now you take the large one and leave me the smaller. You don't love me any more?"

"Nonsense, darling," replied the husband, "you just cook better now."

Source: ajokeaday.com



Silent Letter

When I was in school, I used to ask a lot of questions. One day I asked Ms. Doris, our English teacher, "Why do we ignore some letters 'H' like in hour, honest, honor, etc?"

Ms. Doris replied, "We are not ignoring them. They are considered silent."

During the lunch break, Ms. Doris gave me her packed lunch & asked me to heat it in the cafeteria. I ate all the food and returned her an empty container.

Ms. Doris asked me, "What happened? I told you to go and HEAT my food & you are returning me an empty container?"

"I'm sorry, Ms. Doris, I thought the 'H' was silent."

Source: ajokeaday.com



One Who Does Not Drink

Mrs. Cole, the science teacher, took her students out of school for a social experiment. They arrived at a farmhouse and she placed two buckets in front of a donkey – one filled with water and the other with alcohol.

The donkey drank all the water while leaving the alcohol untouched.

Mrs. Cole asked the students, “What did you learn from this experiment?”

One boy replied, “One who does not drink alcohol is a donkey!”

Source: ajokeaday.com


Jok Onli would like to hear from you
For comments, suggestion and personal concern click the icon below.
Personal emails and stories from our readers would be highly appreciated.